Thursday, 16 February 2017

Lets Talk About: Dating & Relationships

So I'm teaming up with my favourite girlie, my Chummy! Laura announced a few weeks back that she was starting a new series over on her blog called 'Lets talk about' and her first post went up two weeks ago, you can read it here! I love the idea of a chatty series of posts and we have been talking for ages about doing a collaboration and what better way to do this than me jumping in on the 'Lets talk about' series! These posts will be going up every other Thursday at 6pm! You're basically getting a front row seat to our FaceTime calls! For my first showcase in this series we are giving our top 10 tips on dating and relationships! The dating advice on my blog and the relationship advice on Laura's. 

My top 10 dating tips 

Always be yourself

This is probably my biggest tip, being yourself is so important in general not just dating! Its so important in dating because you would never want anybody to think you're somebody you're not, especially if things work out and then you've got to explain that you have been lying to them and they will find out, its hard to keep a front around your friends and family who know what you're like! You also want somebody to like you for you and not a front that you put on, if they don't like you they don't deserve you and there is somebody out there who will like you for who you are! 

Put yourself out there

I've been in the dating game for about 18 months now and things rarely happen in real life like they do in the movies! Its very unlikely you'll meet a man in a bar and fall madly in love! Things like Tinder or Plenty of Fish are really great ways of meeting new people and getting in the dating game, I know plenty of people who have met their long term partners on Tinder and there is nothing wrong with that. People have bad judgement of Tinder but its a dating site, its there for people to meet new people and go on dates! It isn't advertised as a casual sex, hook up app! No judging if thats what you use it for though! 

If they're an arse now, they're probably always going to be one 

If someones a bit of a prat on your first date, I'd probably put that down to nerves but if they're an absolute idiot its probably because they are one! I don't want to sit here and say avoid them or never see them again because that might be what you like but for me personally I wouldn't see somebody again if they were a complete eejit.   

Being loyal 

There's nothing wrong with putting all your eggs in one basket but there still needs to be a sense of loyalty when you're dating! I personally wouldn't be finishing one date and heading off to the next but at the same time I'm not going to be deleting all of my dating app and making wedding band reservations because I've had one good first date!

Know where you stand with them 

This and my last tip go hand in hand! If you want to be casual with somebody you need to make sure they know and they are okay with it, there is nothing worse than leading somebody on. If you want a relationship they need to know as they might not want one and its not fair on either of you when the time comes to end things! If you're honest and open from the outset this will make things so much easier! 

Go somewhere you know on your first date 

This is for your own safety more than anything, you don't want to be going to an unknown place to meet a complete stranger! My go to date place is the coffee shop around the corner from my house, I know it well and I know people that work there so know I'm always going to be safe if things don't go to plan.

Don't assume anything 

Just because they asked you on the date, don't assume they are going to pay for you, always offer to pay for yourself! Just because they're being flirty doesn't mean they want sex so don't assume they do! If they've been single for a while, it doesn't mean they're a bad person or nobody else wants them, they could have got out of a rotten relationship and took some time for themselves! Always ask if you aren't sure and don't pre-judge people. Assumptions cause the biggest problems!

Always tell somebody where you're going 

This links up with going somewhere you know! When I was a kid I always told my mom where I was going so if anything happened or I didn't come home when I was meant to she knew where to look for me! Now I'm older and living away from home I always tell my housemates where I am going and keep them updated so they know I'm safe and well! We may not be 13 anymore but we do need to think about our own safety!

Be safe and know your limits 

Being safe can be taken in any way you wish, I mean it in all ways! If you're out having a drink with someone and you're feeling a little squiffy you should probably slow down and not make yourself vulnerable around a stranger, you also probably shouldn't get in a car with somebody who's been drinking all night! Use your common sense and evaluate the situation!

Make sure you are comfortable 

Don't do anything you don't feel comfortable doing, its completely acceptable to say no! If they are funny because you've said no, explain why you don't feel comfortable and if they still don't get it, they aren't right for you! This is a two way street so always make sure whoever you're dating feels comfortable too, you can normally tell if someone isn't comfortable so ask how you can make them feel better! Talking about things and being honest is the best way! 

Bonus dating tip from Sam

''Don't be nervous, what's the worst that can happen? Be back to square one...''

So there's my top 10 dating tips but don't you worry if you're in a relationship and need some advice you can check out Laura's relationship tips here! I'm so excited to be collaborating with my best friend on a series of posts, so let us know what you would like us to talk about next? Much love as always!


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